This week’s reading of The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian reminded me a lot of the TED Talk we watched at the beginning of the year, “Don’t Ask Where I’m From. Ask Where I am a local” by Taiye Selasi. Junior’s struggle of understanding which part of himself he identifies with more, his Native American culture, or the part of him that he shows when he is with his new white friends is a struggle that many, including myself, go through. He described himself as an apple, “red on the outside, white on the inside”. At my old school, a lot of the South Asian community, that was a lot more involved in the cultural and religious club and extracurriculars, used to call me a coconut, “brown on the outside, white on the inside.” This part of Junior’s struggle I identified with personally. I think an important part of the TED talk by Selasi that I wish I could tell Junior was that where you are from, the name of the place or the culture itself, is not what defines you. It is the experiences, the lessons learned, the stories formed at these places, that make you a local. I, being a child of Pakistani immigrants, had to learn to accept this and take this advice in many of the situations that I found myself in. In a room of non-South Asian people, whether that was in school or in a different setting, I fall victim to stereotypes. Some ask me if my parents will force me to have an arranged marriage, while others ask my opinions on terrorism In a room of “my own people,” however, such as a family dinner or a South Asian Club meeting, I am told my Urdu is not fluent enough, or that I am extremely whitewashed. The struggle of not fitting into the standards set in two communities that you identify with is a struggle that I am sure many, including Junior, can relate to. His struggle of being the outsider in a community of white peers, but also now being considered an outsider in his own native community is a struggle that is a reality, not only for him but for many others. Often times, when asked where I’m from, I struggle trying to figure out if the person is asking about my cultural background, or where in the United States I am from. Although I do not have a problem being asked either of these questions, as both of these are identities that I am proud to have, the mental struggle to figure out which one I want to say first says a lot about my inability, like Junior’s, to choose one side of myself to identify with more than the other.

I have seen many pieces of photography and art in which people show both sides of their identity through split pictures. Though mine is not the best edited, I attached a picture of what I feel accurately describes the two parts that makeup Sehrish Ali. I don’t think I will ever truly choose one over the other because I identify with both. I hope I feel welcome in both of these communities one day.